The Wabi-Sabi Way

As I read the magazine about the “way,” I asked the same question I am sure you are asking now – What the heck is The Wabi-Sabi Way?

Well, it is the “way” I plan on being and thinking from now on.

Wabi-Sabi is when you realize that you are not going to be perfect, your life is not going to be perfect, you are never going to look like Paris Hilton (that’s if you wanted to look like Paris Hilton). It’s also when you realize that your spouse is not perfect, that your kids will never be the genius that discovers the cure for why men go to war, and that you will not keep up with the Jones no matter how hard you try.

The term has Japanese origins and basically describes, “the beauty to be found in that which is incomplete or imperfect.” Wow!!!

So, now I knew what Wabi-Sabi was – but what does it look like? According to the article, an old weathered barn is Wabi-Sabi, as is that old worn t-shirt that you can’t give up, and that comfortable beat up chair from Fraiser. All Wabi-Sabi! In Japan an artist will make sure an art piece has one mistake in it just remind people of the concept of Wabi-Sabi. I guess I can call my dropped stitches in knitting as Wabi-Sabi – I will just pretend I did it on purpose.

But what would happen if we went through life deciding to NOT be perfect and instead to allow our imperfections to shine – our personal Wabi-Sabi? How would life become easier – less stressful – less complicated? How much would our blood pressure decrease if you said, “Oh, it’s OK – It’s Wabi-Sabi!?”

Wabi-Sabi is authentic and simple. It is a natural beauty. As we grow older, Wabi-Sabi allows us to be OK with the parts of us that change. A wrinkle becomes perfect imperfection.

Wabi-Sabi doesn’t mean we don’t try to do better, it simply means that we are at peace with things as they change. You never know how that change may work to your advantage. For example, when I lost my job a few years back I thought this is awful, devastating. But then I discovered coaching – and nothing has been the same since. It completely changed my life for the better. It didn’t happen in one day – it took time – Wabi-Sabi!

How can you make The Wabi-Sabi Way a part of your life? How will it change the way you see things? My suggestion, make Wabi-Sabi a conscious decision and enjoy the journey of life with all its imperfections.

Blessings, Judith Auslander

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Still a Diva at Sixty!

OK, we all have birthdays – but this is a special one for me – today I turned 60. I remember turning 50 and how very difficult that was for me. But 60 – well, it feels OK. I actually waited until my 60th birthday to write this because I wanted to be 60 when I wrote it. I wanted to see if I would feel anything different than what I was feeling, which has been and still is OK!

I believe that 60 is OK because I am happy – and I am happy because I made a choice to BE HAPPY! And yes, it is a choice – a choice we make everyday. I could choose to be disappointed, or sad, or old or numerous other things – but I have made a personal choice to be happy – happy with life, happy with who I am, happy with the things I am doing, happy with friends and family.

So, what happens when we make a choice to be something or to see something in a certain way? It happens! It is that simple. Our mind is a powerful tool that we can use to create happiness or sadness. If we only truly understood what a powerful tool our brain is – how are thoughts can literally create change – we would think a lot more about – dare I say – what we think.

We know that when someone is miserable, angry, or sad and they walk into the room – we can feel that energy around them. Our body and nervous system immediately respond. Now, what happens when someone enters a room filled with joy and happiness – we respond to that as well?

We really do have super powers – we have the power – each one of us – to bring joy or sadness into a room. How will you use your super powers?

And here is the fun part, if you walk into the world with joy, the more joy will come to you. Just as the reverse is true – if you walk into the world with anger, hatred, or self-pity – you will attract more of that. What do you want to attract?

In my case, I made a conscious decision about 4 years ago to change my thoughts, to change my way of looking at my life and the world. I decided to go toward the light and away from the darkness. I am not going to say that it was immediate – but I will say that like any habit, that the more I practice it – the more natural it seems – and thus the more the opposite just no longer works.

So, how do you walk out into the world? Make it a choice.

My birthday gift is that I wish each of you Blessings and more Blessings!

Judith Auslander,
Wise Heart Coaching

http://www.WiseHeartCoaching.com

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by Judith Auslander, MA, CLC

Wise Heart Coaching

It’s the “Holidays” again, which can either bring joy or a feeling of too-much-to-do-with-too-little-time.  So, here are some tips to help make the holidays a little more stress free for you.  Remember to check out my important life saving tip and gift giving ideas at the bottom.

Tip One

De-clutter your life at least once a week for maybe about one hour.  Get rid of the things that are lying around not being used.  Go through the mass of papers that seem to multiply. Donate old clothing.   Let go of stuff!

Tip Two

Realize that everything you bring into your life requires care and feeding. Think of this when you contemplate buying something new for yourself or someone else. Ask yourself, “Do I really need this? “Does he or she really need this?”  If you don’t get an absolute yes or no, then let it rest a couple of days.  If you still believe the item is necessary then by all means, purchase the item. But remember, if it is gone, you must be ready to say, “Oh well, that’s just the way it was suppose to be.”

Tip Three

Practice appreciation.  Tell someone 3 things you appreciate about him/her; tell the clerk at the post office and the grocery store that you appreciate them. They will probably thank you with a smile, which will brighten your day as well. Think in an appreciative voice, talk in an appreciative voice, be in appreciation.

Tip Four

With times being what they are, this would be a great time to give gifts that are more intangible. Some ideas might be: a gift certificate for an overnight trip, 3 hours of gardening, or time spent doing something the recipient would enjoy. This will keep the stress out of shopping for just the right gift. It will also relieve the stress of the mall-shopping madhouse. Remember, it is not the cost of the gift, but the thought behind it.  The value is in the thoughtfulness, love, and care put into it. See below for some gift making ideas.

Tip Five

Before you start eating those big holiday meals, begin it with appreciation of where the food came from.  Before overeating, pay attention to that moment when your body has had exactly enough. This avoids the bellyache and guilt of eating too much. Chew slowly appreciating the flavors. Put your fork down between each bite to avoid stuffing your mouth. Thank the chef (even if it is you) for the time it took to prepare the meal.

Tip Six

Go through your checkbook and your credit card bills. Bring your accounts up to date. Be more conscious of what you use, consume, spend. Contribute money to things you believe in and truly care about.

Tip Seven

Change your talk to that of sufficiency. See yourself as having enough. Talk as if you have enough. Shift any conversation from scarcity to sufficiency.  Remember there is plenty of everything love, money, possessions, anything and everything you need or desire. Appreciate what you have and if you want more, ask spirit for it.  Ask, Believe, and allow yourself to Receive.

Tip Eight

Above all, enjoy the holidays.  They are a time of family, friends, and appreciation. If you live alone, find a place where you can volunteer your time or invite others who do not have family to your home to celebrate. Be in a place of abundance and gratitude.

Shalom (blessings),

Judith Auslander, Wise Heart Coaching

Important Tip!

Protect yourself and your family by ICING your cell phone.

Add ICE (In Case of Emergency) to your cell phone.  Emergency crews know to look at cell phones for ICE numbers.

Gift Making Ideas:

• Gift Coupon Book that you made yourself.  Include things like Foot Massage, Manicure, Babysitting, Shopping Date, Homemade Dinner of choice, etc.
• It’s your Day – give the gift of a special day.
• Take an old puzzle and decoupage it with old photos, memorabilia, collage items, etc. You could then carefully cut the pieces apart and make a whole new puzzle which relates to the person.
• An alternative to the idea above was recently sent to me. Have everyone in the family take a puzzle piece or pieces and decorate it with love or appreciation or something important to him or her about the family then put the puzzle back together and you have a permanent family reminder of what the family means to each member.
• There are lots of great websites for gift making ideas you don’t have to be a professional or even artistic to find something that you can do.

I would love to hear from you.  Please send me a note letting me know what you thought of these ideas.  Also, please feel free to forward it to friends and loved ones – or invite them to sign up for my free newsletter at Wise Hearth Coaching 

In appreciation,

Judith

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Do not undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others.
It is because we are different that each of us is special.

Do not set your goals by what other people deem important.
Only you know what is best for you.
Do not take for granted the things closest to your heart.

Cling to them as you would your life, for without them, life is meaningless.
Do not let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past nor for the future.
By living your life one day at a time, you live all of the days of your life.
Do not give up when you still have something to give.
Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying.
It is a fragile thread that binds us to each other.

Do not be afraid to encounter risks.
It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave.
Do not shut love out of your life by saying it is impossible to find.
The quickest way to receive love is to give love.
The fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly.
In addition, the best way to keep love is to give it wings

Do not dismiss your dreams.
To be without dreams is to be without hope.
To be without hope is to be without purpose.
Do not run through life so fast that you forget not only where you have been,
but also where you are going.

Life is not a race, but a journey to be savored each step of the way.

Thanks to StoryBin for this wonderful thought. You know, only you can decide how you should live and grow. So slowdown, take  a deep breath and enjoy every moment of your life. Live your life by your own standards.

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