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I visited a friend today who is struggling with endometrial cancer. She is only a few years older than my age, about 53, and she’s had a difficult life in the almost twenty years that I have known her. She is a single mother who raised five children on her own, went on to own her own farm, and made a name for herself in her small community.  Yet now, each day is a struggle, and blends from one day into the next.

As we age, we begin to be faced with our own immortality, especially when our friends and loved ones become ill and sometimes die. In this day and age it seems like there should be more that can be done for someone who always enjoyed seemingly good health, but is suddenly faced with a life-threatening illness.

At 51 I think of myself as having many years yet to enjoy a fulfilling life. Yet, some of our generation are not so fortunate. It brings to mind the question of when we are ill, does there come a certain time when we say no to any more tests and interventions? Do we want to struggle to the end, fighting and clawing to stay alive, or will we just leave the outcome in the hands of a higher power, whoever it might be that you believe in.

I’ve see both scenarios in the last ten years — struggling and fighting to the end, demanding the latest tests and drugs, and I’ve also witnessed a quiet passing, letting each day unfold as it may, surrounded by family at home. This early ending to life is not something we really want to think about, but at times, it is unavoidable. Ultimately, it’s each individual’s decision as to how they want to leave this life. All we can do as friends and family is support their decisions and offer guidance along the way.