By Rita R. Robison, Consumer Specialist, Blogging at The Survive and Thrive Boomer Guide
Guest Blogger
One way baby boomers can make progress in getting what they want in life is to hire a life coach.
Life coaches, who often work with clients over the phone, help people set goals and move toward achieving them. They can help boomers who are dealing with:

• Helping aging parents.

• Increasing stress at home and on the job.

• Raising children.

• Figuring out what they want to do in retirement.

I worked with a life coach several years ago and had positive results. I wanted to do more consumer writing. Now here I am today with two boomer consumer blogs and the opportunity to blog once a week for Boomer411.
If you decide to work with a life coach, be sure you undertake a thorough selection process. Life coaches aren’t regulated in most states so anyone can say they’re a life coach.
Here’s a check list for choosing a life coach:

• Interview at least three life coaches.

• Find out how much a session costs, how long the sessions will be, and how many times a month they’re offered.

• Ask if you’ll be required to make a commitment for a certain number of appointments.

• Ask about the life coach’s credentials, for example whether he or she is certified by the International Coach Federation. (You can go to the federation’s Web site and search for the names of life coaches in your area.)

• Ask about the coach’s educational background, professional background, and years of experience.

• Find out if the coach will offer a complimentary session so you can ask questions and see if you would like working with the coach.

• Choose a life coach you feel comfortable with.

Life coaches charge from $25 to $300 per session, with the average being around $125.

For more information on life coaching, see the article “Life Coaches Are Helping Baby Boomers Create Better Lives” on my Seattle Post-Intelligencer reader blog the Boomer Consumer.

Popularity: 17% [?]

by Judith Auslander, Life Coach of the Wise Heart Coaching fame

Ooh, now let’s get down tonight
Baby I’m hot just like an oven
I need some lovin’
And baby, I can’t hold it much longer
It’s getting stronger and stronger
Sexual Healing by Marvin Gaye

Last week we talked about the need to add romance. This week – it is ‘sex.”

Why is it that much of media thinks that humans over a certain age no longer think about nor want sex? Excuse me – but we know better. I personally love the show “Boston Legal” because of the 40, 50, 60 and 70 year olds who all work together and seem to all have an active sex life. I love that the 40-year-old lawyer thinks that his boss is sexy – and she is at least 25 years older than him. Hurray!!!! Why not???

It is a myth that men and women suddenly no longer care for a good romp in the bed when they get older. OK, maybe it isn’t every night – but once a week is still OK. One date I had actually thought that women over 50 no longer wanted sex. Really????

Yes, there may be physical issues that get in the way – but with love and caring they do not have to be an issue. For men there seem to be a huge variety of pharmaceuticals and natural remedies for his ED. (Funny until that little blue pill we never even thought about ED – at least I didn’t.) For women it may be dryness or irritation. There are creams and gels that help with female issues as well. In other words, there is no excuse. See your doctor if you are having problems in these areas. It seems the medical association and drug companies are very concerned about your sex life. Now it is time for you to be.

Sex is healthy at any age (check with your doctor first if you have heart concerns) and can actually be considered a form of exercise. “So honey – the gym or the bedroom?” You burn a lot of calories having intercourse. It also is a great way to lift your mood, feel more energized, and of course, bring a great glow to your skin. In other words, it is healthy.

So, what stops us from having sex more often? It may be because you don’t have anyone in your life – I get that one!!!! But often even those who are married – miss out on the joys of sex. It is usually because we get lazy. My suggestion, if sex has drifted out of your marriage, check out the issues before this one and put some of those methods to work. Ladies there are those PPP’s? And men, I suggest grooming.

Next Topic: Love Nest.

Other posts in this series:

• Part 1: Passionate Purple Panties (PPPs)
• Part 2: Sexy at 64
• Part 3: Bring on the Romance!!!
• Part 4: Pina Caladas?

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by Judith Auslander, Life Coach of Wise Heart Coaching fame

“If you like Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain.
If you’re not into yoga, if you have half-a-brain.
If you like making love at midnight, in the dunes of the cape.
I’m the lady you’ve looked for, write to me, and escape.”
Escape (The Pina Colada Song)
(Rupert Holmes)

Last issue we talked about the need to add romance back into your relationship to create the feeling of love.

One of the best ways is to re-create romance is to go back to where is started – “Date Night,”
Remember when you knew that Friday or Saturday night was “date night” and you would dress up, clean up, and get all blushed with excitement? Come on – you remember. Well, create that feeling again by planning a weekly “date night.” My thought is that it should vary – take turns – one week one partner and the next week the other partner comes up with a scathingly brilliant idea for a date. This means you cannot get lazy about this – you have to plan – and start planning a week or more ahead.

Some date night ideas are to say it with flowers or candy (best if it is organic, super dark chocolate, but only a bite). Both men and women love to receive flowers, or a small plant, and/or candy. Be sure to call (I don’t care if it is from the next room from one cell phone to the other) or send an invitation. Invitations make it extra special. Then plan – make sure everything is well planned out. And remember, date night does not have to cost a lot. Sometimes the simpler the better – and the more romantic!

So, here are some creative ideas that my clients have come up with:
• Picnic in the living room with romantic music and a fire (if you have a fireplace of course.)
• Going to the park and watching the sunset. Be sure to bring an extra blanket to cover yourselves with to keep warm and to get closer.
• Have a beauty spa: paint each others toenails, massage each others backs using a nice oil, or wash his or her hair. Or just care for one person this week and the next the other – this creates a feeling of being special for the night.
• Make it a game night. Play cards or a board game or maybe strip poker.
• Watch a romantic movie such as Casablanca, The Graduate or It Happened One Night
• Or watch a sexy movie – How about the original Thomas Crown Affair – and be sure to share food together!
• Find a hobby you both can enjoy together. Stay active – hiking, biking, gym membership, dancing lessons, yoga, or Nia.

When you are in public, hold hands and kiss – people won’t think what’s with these “horny old people?” Rather they will think it is sweet – this is one of the joys of getting older.

Next Topic – shhhh – sex!!!!

Other posts in this series:

• Part 1: Passionate Purple Panties (PPPs)
• Part 2: Sexy at 64
• Part 3: Bring on the Romance!!!

Popularity: 10% [?]

by Judith Auslander, Life Coach of the Wise Heart Coaching fame

Last issue we talked about looking sexy – now we talk about Romance!!!!

Remember that song, “Do you love me?” from Fiddler on the Roof?  Tevye sings to Golde, “Do you love me?” and she responds,

“Do I love you?
For twenty-five years I’ve washed your clothes
Cooked your meals, cleaned your house
Given you children, milked the cow
After twenty-five years, why talk about love right now?”

Why talk about love right now?  Do we need to be told we are loved?  Do we need to tell our partner that we love them?  The response to both questions is “hell yes!”  We never tire of hearing those precious words that we are loved and cared for.  Why do we stop saying we love someone – the reasons are numerous.  It could be because we get lazy, it could be because we no longer think our partner loves us, it may be because we don’t see our own selves as loveable.  The thing is we can rekindle the romantic spark of love – even if it has been twenty-five years – or a lot more. 

Remember the song, “Escape” (better known as the Pina Colada song)?

I was tired of my lady, we’d been together too long.
Like a worn-out recording, of a favorite song. 
Rupert Holmes

This kind of “worn out recording” happens because we stop asking what the other person wants, needs or enjoys.  We start assuming.  That is pure laziness!!!  The best way to rekindle the words, “I love you,” is to rekindle your interest in your partner – and the romance. 

So, how do you add romance back into a marriage or relationship?  This is easy, but it will take work.  The thing is we tend to lose imagination.  Guys, once again, pretend you are 19 and want some.  Ladies, pretend you are sweet 16 and really want to be kissed.  Use variety and imagination. 

Next week’s Topic – So you really like Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain??????

Other posts in this series:

• Part 1: Passionate Purple Panties (PPPs)
• Part 2: Sexy at 64

Popularity: 8% [?]

 by Judith Auslander, Life Coach of the Wise Heart Coaching fame

Our last post we talked about the importance of pulling out the PPP’s.  This time we will talk about how to be sexy at not only 64 – but at 40, 50, 55, 65, 70, 80, 100. 

When I get older losing my hair
Many years from now
Will you still be sending me a valentine
Birthday greetings bottle of wine – McCartney

 I have an article on my refrigerator, which I cut out of a magazine years ago – “Assume that your partner is not as critical of your body as your are.”  What a concept!  Yes, you may have

·        saggy boobs

·        lowered butt

·        wider hips

·        protruding stomach

·        age spots

·        wrinkles

·        chin hair

·        moustache

·        and all those other wonderful juicy things about aging -

but when you love someone, is it really about those things or the lips you have kissed for years that still turn you on? 

We are marketed to ad nauseam about how we need to improve this or that – we are never just OK the way we are.  For a change – assume that your lover is not as critical of you as you are about yourself – and love him or her, as you want – without fear. 

Now, that being said, I do suggest – especially to you guys – to clean up your act a little.  This means bathe, shave, avoid walking around in your under shorts, take care of your teeth, trim the nose and ear hair, use mouth wash – care for yourself as you would if you were 19 again and wanting to get laid.  Come on – no one wants to be tickled by nose hair while kissing. 

Ladies, it doesn’t matter if you look in the mirror and question how the guy you love could love you when you see everything that is wrong with you.  It doesn’t matter because he doesn’t see those things.  What he worries about is will you love him with his love handles, pouchy belly, and arms that lack the muscle of youth – and what about his “man boobs?” 

Come on ladies and gents – aging is part of life.  You know, I often wonder how dogs make it through life without all our human concerns.  A bitch has puppies and her titties sag and her belly droops, but she sure doesn’t seem to care.  She is happy to just go for a walk.  What if we were like that? 

Tomorrow’s topic: “Bring on the romance!”

Other posts in this series:

• Part 1: Passionate Purple Panties (PPPs)

Popularity: 8% [?]